rosemary roasted almonds {a butt story}

rosemary roasted almonds| theclevercarrot.com

I got the goods.

Remember that crazy, insomniac purchase from last week? The Brazil Butt Lift is here!

Included with my new workout DVD is a chart with 3 different butt types to choose from: square, pear, or too big. OK? You should’ve seen me trying to figure this out. Curtains drawn and backside to the mirror, it was just me and my butt. I whipped my head around from side to side trying to achieve the best view. It was one of the most un-glamourous moments of my life. Did I mention that you need to take a picture? Yeah, a butt selfie. Hard evidence is essential to track your progress (I will burn this later…).

Eventually, a selection was made. Now you must follow the specified workout tailored to your type. 

rosemary roasted almonds | theclevercarrot.com

Easy, right?

Yesterday, I began with ‘Bum Bum Rapido’  followed by ‘Tummy Tuck’ (don’t even). Suited up in my finest gear, I laid out my mat. I filled up my water bottle. It was me against the supermodels. After the first 30 minutes, my whole body started to shake like an avalanche. Was I panting? I was definitely panting… There was no way I was going to make it to the end. It’s best described as kickboxing meets power yoga meets early 90’s dance moves with a Brazilian accent. Thumbs up.

Also included with my workout is a meal plan. Care for 20 whole almonds?

Not me.

rosemary roasted almonds | theclevercarrot.com

I’d rather starve.

Although I like almonds, I can’t stand them plain. They’re just so plain. Slivered almonds are fine, but the big fat ones remind me of dry, chewy pieces of cardboard. I can’t help but wonder how to make them taste better.

(Hint: rosemary + brown sugar).

This jetpack of flavors can transform even the plainest of things. It will make your kitchen smell amazing. Also worth noting is the addition of egg whites as a binding agent. You want your rosemary on your nuts, not on the tray. Using olive oil will work too, but egg whites have the added bonus of making the almonds extra crispy. It’s a texture thing. Because I use fresh rosemary as opposed to dried, you must bake at a low temperature to prevent burning. Cool before eating for maximum crunch.

These almonds make a great snack, are super portable, and tasty enough to serve as a party nibble.

rosemary roasted almonds | theclevercarrot.comrosemary roasted almonds | theclevercarrot.com

In my world, rules are sometimes meant to be broken.

There’s no doubt that almonds are incredibly good for you. They’re packed with nutrients, essential fats, and mood-boosting minerals. There’s a reason why that meal plan suggests this as a healthy snack. But if healthy stuff doesn’t taste good, I say skip it.

Life’s too short to eat cardboard!

Tip:

  • This recipe calls for 1 egg white. Save/freeze the yolk for pasta carbonara!
  • These nuts are lightly sweetened. Add more brown sugar if you prefer.
  • If almonds aren’t your thing, substitute with your favorite nut. Same rules apply.
rosemary roasted almonds
 
Prep time
Cook time
Total time
 
Author:
Serves: 2 cups
Ingredients
  • 2 c. skin-on whole almonds
  • 1 egg white
  • 1 tbsp. roughly chopped rosemary
  • 2 tsp. brown sugar
  • 1 tsp. Kosher salt
  • ½ tsp. paprika
  • pinch of cayenne (optional)
Garnish
  • flaky sea salt*
  • rosemary sprigs
* I use Maldon flaky sea salt
** These nuts are lightly sweetened. Add more brown sugar if you prefer.
Instructions
  1. Preheat your oven to 325 F. Line a rimmed baking sheet with parchment paper.
  2. Add the almonds to a large bowl.
  3. In another bowl, whisk the egg white until frothy. Add the rosemary, brown sugar, salt, paprika, and cayenne (if using). Mix thoroughly until the sugar is dissolved.
  4. Pour the mixture over the almonds and toss well to combine.
  5. Spread the almonds out onto the prepared baking sheet in one single layer.
  6. Bake for about 20 minutes, stirring once or twice to break up the pieces. The nuts are ready when all of the moisture has evaporated.
  7. Remove from the oven and sprinkle with flaky sea salt.
  8. Cool before serving for maximum crunch.
  9. Store in an air-tight container with rosemary sprigs.

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Comments

    • Emilie says

      Hi Anne! Normally, I don’t mind things that are plain but whole almonds are an exception. Unless it’s chopped up, sprinkled, and folded into my food, then I’m OK. It’s just one of those things.
      Oh, and that selfie? Already destroyed! I’ll track my progress another way for sure ;)

  1. says

    Oh, but (so to speak) I am SO glad you tried the Brazilian Butt Lift. I have seen the infomercial a zillion times and wondered just what the workout was really like. It looks very challenging, perhaps too challenging for someone my age, 62 y.o.

    These nuts look fab. I make something quite similar, and I just gobble them up. Roasted nuts, kissed with spices and sugar are awfully good.

    Good luck with the workout. Keep us posted with your progress!

    • Emilie says

      Hi Adri! I was very skeptical about this workout at first because infomercials have such a ‘cheesy’ reputation. But I couldn’t pry myself away! I convinced myself that I could always return the DVDs if they were really that bad, and with free shipping it would’t cost me a dime. I’m such a sucker. I’ve been into it for almost a week now and surprisingly, I think it’s a really good exercise routine. I haven’t been able to walk! I will definitely keep you posted with (hopefully) good results :)

  2. says

    HAHA I love the story behind this!! And these almonds look absolutely incredible. I just caramelized walnuts over the weekend and was crazy about them — these rosemary brown sugar almonds sound even better. I can’t wait to try it. Thanks so much for sharing!

    • Emilie says

      Hi Cynthia! Yeah, for some reason I feel the need to tell the world about my butt! It must be my subconscious excuse to keep it all going. It’s like reporting to a friend that you’ve just joined the gym- you need to be held accountable! We’ll see how it goes…
      Caramelized walnuts sounds delicious too. I love walnuts in my oatmeal with blueberries. We’re both nutty about nuts? ;)

    • Emilie says

      Hello dessert queen! Definitely give it a try! Rosemary pairs really well with brown sugar and smoky paprika for these almonds. Although they are not very sweet, the seasonings spruce up an otherwise plain Jane snack. xx

  3. says

    Oh my goodness, that is just hilarious!! First having to characterize your behind and then tracking the progress (I actually like the idea of seeing progress it’s just that in this context it’s too funny…). I smiled about the “I’d rather starve than eat whole almonds” — really? that’s quite dramatic ;-) — they’re just almonds! BUT, I have to agree, you have transformed them into something rather extraordinary here and decidedly festive. How pretty would this be as a holiday gift :). Gorgeous shots Emilie! (of the almonds I mean — heeheeh).

    • Emilie says

      Totally dramatic! You are 100% correct. My almond aversion actually looks a lot worse on paper (i.e. screen) I promise you ;)
      Oh my goodness… and Christmas? Absolutely. I didn’t even think of that. But now that I’m looking at those rosemary sprigs this would make a festive gift. Thank you love xx

  4. says

    These sound really yummy. I love nuts of all kinds but I agree, they can taste a bit bland sometimes – especially if an almond skin gets stuck in your throat! Looks like a lovely snack.

    • Emilie says

      Welcome Emma! (love your name…) I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one out there that’s not too keen on plain almonds. I try to make healthy choices as best I can, but sometimes you need to spruce them up! These still fall in the good for you range since they’re not very sweet and roasted with only an egg white instead of olive oil, although very good for you as well ;) Enjoy!

  5. says

    See, the problem then would be to eat just 20 almonds rather than the whole tray! We make a similar recipe with different spices, but also bound with egg white. Darling, why on earth are you worried about your butt – you’re stunningly gorgeous!

    • Emilie says

      Ha! No, I’m not worried… I just happened to get suckered into a really cheesy infomercial and I feel the need to announce it to the world. Thank you love :) xx

  6. says

    This post made me laugh! Although I was trying to figure out what a square butt would look like?
    Personally, I love almonds. My boyfriend on the other hand described them pretty much exactly like you did. So it was funny when his mom sent him a care package with a HUGE container of almonds. At least I have a recipe to use up our abundant supply!

    • Emilie says

      Hi there! Don’t even- trying to choose your butt from a chart was not one of my best moments.
      That’s so funny there you boyfriend and I feel the same way about almonds. You should make him these for sure! :)

    • Emilie says

      Hi! You are quite welcome! Healthy snacks can be hard to come up with sometimes- it’s like you see the same stuff over and over again. I’m a big fan of eating what you like with small, reasonable changes. I hope you enjoy!!

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